Permission to go kind of bat shit

going through a break up

The coolest thing about going through a break up is that it gives you permission to go kind of bat shit crazy for a little while.  You can…

Spend Saturday night finger-painting alone in your bedroom.  Listen to Radiohead, “In Rainbows” on repeat.  Pound wine. 
 
Question your life’s purpose.  Sob in the middle of the workday.  Then remember the starving children in Africa.  Feel guilty.  Cry again. Blame your puffy eyes on allergies.
Obsessively watch CW shows about teens with magical powers.  Buy potted plants.  Forget to water them.  Wonder if it’s symbolic. 
 
Come home from Traget with a $300 industrial juicer, kale and intentions of a vegan lifestyle. Fantasize about quitting your job to surf in Costa Rica…paint in India….eat croissants in Paris…teach yoga in Bali…then remember how lucky you are to get payed to play on twitter all day.
 
Fill a prescription for Xanax.  Use it once and decide it’s not for you. Leave rambling voicemails on your friends’ answering machines at 3am.  Wonder if you’ll ever have sex again.  Consider dating women. Quickly decide against it.
 
Cackle with your girlfriends about how ridiculous life is.  Strike up conversations with strangers. Question your beliefs. Put sparkly cupcake stickers on everything you own.
 
Rock out to “Call Me Maybe” in the car.  Notice the people staring and groove on anyway.  Consider getting a tattoo with something deep and profound and meaningful.  Come up totally blank.
 
Start paying attention to yourself, your feelings, and your intuition.  Buy a lot of self-help books.  Introspect.  Journal.  Switch to organic egg free cookie dough…and feel kind of proud of yourself.  Drink more kale juice.  Eat more cookie dough. 
 
Consider paying to have your chakras cleared. Post way to many Facebook updates. Pray.  
 
Slowly slowly slowly start feeling like your old self again. Notice cute boys.  Make new friends. Get really excited the first time Adele comes on the radio and you don’t cry.   Laugh at yourself.
 
Begin to realize that everything really does happen for a reason, that you’re going to be just fine, that your friends are fucking amazing, and that time really does heal all.